Monday, March 29, 2010

Mitten Shows

After I returned from Las Vegas, I did shows in Michigan during the remainder of February. As much as I love the free cable and hot tubs (and, for the love of everything holy, let’s not forget the sample-sized bottles of shampoo and conditioner) that hotels feature, being in my own bed is pretty fantastic (especially since I’ve upgraded from a futon to an actual mattress and box-spring).

I performed at the Odawa Casino for the first time. I didn’t get any pictures inside the showroom, but it was white, circular and looked like something the Jetsons would frequent. It was pretty cool in a futuristic sort of way, and the crowd was a lot of fun.

I did, however, get some shots of the fa├žade of the building and outside signage.

See? Proof that I was there (and that I endured more of Michigan’s snow).

Taken on the drive home:

Dear Northern Michigan, I have no idea how you created this, but I find your work most impressive.

And I am happy to report, I did not lose a single cent gambling (and I received a tip after the show to boot!).

During the following week, I worked at Joey’s Comedy Club in Livonia, Michigan. I had the pleasure of sharing the stage with my good buddy, Keith Lenart, Ty Barnett and Dave Mishevitz. I had never met Ty and Dave before, but they are both very funny peeps and super nice guys.

Keith's set inspired him to sit on my lap, explain that he's been "so good this year," and tell me what he'd like for Christmas. Despite his pleas, nothing but coal for him. Insert evil laugh here.

With Ty and Dave. Apparently, someone didn't get the "make a silly face" memo and instead went with the tried and true "Glamour Shots" face.

On Friday, Alisa, one of my friends from high school, came to the show with her husband, Dan. It was great to catch up with them…and it’s quite nice to hear a familiar laugh in the crowd (especially from a person who can identify with what you’re joking about, such as being from a town that’s so small they place cows on the football field and take bets on which yard line said cows will defecate on).

I always enjoy working at Joey’s, and my most recent stint there was a lot of fun. We had a few sold-out performances, did three shows on Saturday…and during one of the shows, my earrings were heckled. I’ve been heckled for many things, but never for the metal that hangs from my earlobes. Something to take note of, I suppose. Luckily, what could have turned into him calling my jewelry ugly, turned into a 30 second plug for the store where I purchased it. Accordingly, I think someone at Forever 21 owes Table #17 guy and me some commission. I’ll gladly accept mine in the form of Bud Light and scratch-off lottery tickets.

Friday, March 26, 2010

What happens in Vegas...makes a nice, cliche title for this blog entry

At the beginning of February, I took my first vacation in a year (save some brief trips to visit family or stalk the New Kids on the Block).

Since Spirit Airlines has mega-cheap flights to Vegas, I figured why not? I am happy to report that I only lost $3.00 on gambling the entire time I was there. I lost significantly more at the bar, but we won’t go into that.

The trip consisted mostly of walking up and down the strip (with alcohol in hand, of course), catching a show, tracking down Elvis impersonators (this is a must, no?) and reveling in the warm weather (I do believe 50 degrees constitutes flip-flop climate).

The key to making a 4 1/2 hour flight go by quickly? A Snuggie...and Spirit's cheap beer specials!

On the plane. Let the alcoholism commence!

Where I snored and drooled for four nights.

For $28.00, you too can stay in a palace.

Why, yes, I did pay entirely too much to drink out of the Eiffel Tower. So glad we Americanized Paris with slot machines, buffets and huge amounts of liquor.

This pretty much sums up my trip: casinos, booze and posing for corny pictures.

Shocked or excited by women in lingerie? You be the judge.

The Planet Hollywood Buffet. Bad idea.

Post-buffet food coma.

Sammy Hagar makes tequila. For $53, a bartender will combine it with 100 ounces of blue slurpee, and put the whole mess in a plastic guitar. This should be illegal.

Tuning or reliving my college days?

Hangover in the making.

The Paris Casino. Pretty self-explanatory.

More Paris.

Senior portrait reenactment at the Bellagio.

Plant-life makes Todd smile.

Epitome of maturity outside of Caesar’s Palace.

Part of the strip at night.

More Paris.

A view from the top of the Eiffel Tower. Unless you like feeling as though you might plummet to your death in an elevator, I don’t recommend going up. The view was pretty though.

Who is this creep?

The Venetian…and some random dude who walked through my picture.

More Venetian.

The Venetian's ceiling.

The Venetian's ceiling along with our mugs. Woot for cameras with self-timers.

Posing with fake people.

Just like actual Venice, except with way more gluttony, souvenirs and fanny packs.

Inside the Venetian.

During the trip, I went to the Wynn for the first time. Fancy schmancy pants!

Todd getting his brain sucked out at the oxygen bar.

Taking an oxygen hit, getting a massage from a gadget that resembled an ipod and having endorphins delivered to my brain via a vibrating coat hanger. Holy wow!

Serious flippin’ dork.

Todd displays his big win. Don't spend that 9 cents all in one place!

Another shot of the strip.

Allow me to repeat myself: serious flippin’ dork. This time outside of the Luxor.

The very last day, I finally found Elvis. What would a trip to Vegas be without him?

Not sure that this is going to happen at the casino, but still a cool sign. And one of my favorite words.

A fun trip overall, but I think I’ve had my fill of overindulgence for at least a month or two. Who knows though? By April, I might be ready to go back and play blackjack while being force-fed shots, vegan mashed potatoes and dark chocolate, while simultaneously being hooked up to a cocaine drip and getting a foot massage.